Mother

Mother
You have reached the end of your journey
And a new one begins
We will mourn our loss and cherish our memories

You life was never easy and now the pain has ended.
Today we are saying goodbye to you, Mother

We loved and got mad at you
We laughed and cried with you.

We were there as you lost a husband
two sons
A father and mother
A sister, a grandson

We hope where ever this new journey takes you
You find the peace and comfort you deserve.
Goodbye Mom, we love you.

To Nicole, my beloved friend


Go with the flow of life
Ride the tides to the end
The heaviest surf is
Between those tides
And yet we stay afloat as
We drift to the shore

We are but mere grains of sand
Deposited on the shore of life
Sometimes we are made in to castles
Or wonderful sculptures
Carefully molded by loving hands

Sometimes we are walked up on
By life’s cruel feet
Our souls broke and we are
Once again swept out to sea
On the waves of life

pjk 2009

The Room

The dimly lit room reflects my mood
The pain of loss is overwhelming
I feel naked as the bulb hanging from the ceiling
And as tattered as the spread draped over
The rusty old bed

All my emotions are flashing in me like
The neon sign out side the room
The blinking broken light in the room,
making it almost surreal and eerie.

The shabby old carpet bare thread
With years of people trampling it
Like the footprints that have walked overme all my life,
leaving deep imprints on my body and soul

The bottle of pills lying by me
And they tempt me.
I know they bring release from
This life of pain that has haunted me
For lasting sleep is what I need.

Memories of You

Memories of you locked in my heart forever
Whispered voices on the phone
Looks across a crowded room
What we had bordered on love never Realizing it

At times in my bed in moments of self pleasure
I feel you gently touch me and I softly say your name
When I cry, I feel you wiping my tears away,
You gently touch my cheek.

I know that I found what could have been
And realizing it never will
I now move on with the memory
Of a love that might have been.

The end

You

You


I know I told you that I am over you
Told you I am moving on with my life
No longer do I cry over you

Lies, all lies from my lips
Loving you is all I have
You are my heart
The breath I take

My every thought is of you
All my dreams are of holding you
Nothing matters anymore
If you are not in my life

You will never know this
My lips are sealed
My heart is locked tight
Holding your memory inside

Broken

Today I feel broken,
cracked images of me
Are revealed in the looking glass
The shattered pieces of my life
Lay on the tiled floor.
Losing their sparkle
In the neon light of the room
Like dying embers of coal
Lifeless and empty
I sweep them up,
tossing them
Into the dark void of the trash can.
Looking at them with a disconnected
Memory of the woman I was

Darkness

Darkness, quiet, loneliness
Lurking in my mind

Sensing the need for pain
For only it can soothe me

Turmoil brews as I lay
In my bed pondering
The cold steel blade

A cut in a place
No one ever sees

the pain will help if
For only the day

I feel the blade
Inside my flesh

And the sweet pain
Returns!